The soundtrack of my life

A friend of mine recently posted a question on Facebook.  He asked "Using a current movie soundtrack (animated or live), which one would be your Soundtrack of your life?"  My answer was Almost Famous.  Mostly because it's an awesome soundtrack that includes a lot of Led Zeppelin, and I am a lifelong Zeppelin fan.  It was probably one of the best soundtracks, with a large variety of songs that cover many aspects of life.  I guess this may be why this collection of music spoke to me.  

I have been having a difficult weekend, dealing with a lot of anger and depression.  My hormones are all askew, and so are my moods.  With nothing to watch on TV, I've been listening to music a lot.  Lately it has been mostly metal.  A lot of Mudvayne, Rage Against the Machine, Alice in Chains.  Some of these songs tend to be angry or depressing.  I've been stuck on metal for months.  It is and has been a favorite of mine for a long time, but my musical taste is really much more varied.  So this evening I spent some time adding a whole bunch of genres to my Pandora playlist.  And so far, I'm loving it.  I just listened to NWO by Ministry, a classic from when I was in high school.  Earlier I heard Buffalo Soldier by Bob Marley, live, and now Three Days Grace is playing.  I've got various types of metal, blues, reggae, rock, classic rock, ska, alternative, industrial, country.  I'm pretty happy with what I'm hearing, and I'm considering upgrading to Pandora One and discontinuing my Slacker Radio subscription.  Slacker always cuts off after awhile and that tends to happen less with Pandora anyway.  Plus, it'll be better for me to listen to a wider variety of music when I'm in the car with my boys.

All this has had me thinking about what music means to me.  Movie soundtracks were mentioned earlier, and I have to say that a well placed song can really bring back a scene from a movie.  Whenever I hear American Girl by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, I think of that girl in the movie who was singing along to that tune as she drove, unaware that she was being targeted for abduction and future murder by the demented serial killer Buffalo Bill.  The one that really gets me is when I hear Smooth Criminal by Alien Ant Farm.  This one always gets me thinking of American Pie 2.  That was the scene when Jim accidentally superglued his hand to his dick, and then his other hand to the porno tape.  That one always makes me laugh as I picture the beleaguered Jim trying desperately to get out of that situation without anyone finding out, and of course he winds up unsuccessful.  Classic!  Whenever I hear Everybody Wants Some by Van Halen, I always think of the animated hamburgers in Lane's fantasy sequence on Better Off Dead.  In Your Eyes by Peter Gabriel always conjures the image of John Cusack holding that boombox above his head, baring his heartbreak to his beloved.  

My husband doesn't seem to be very much into music.  His taste is very limited.  I have to have music, every day.  I grew up with a lot of music.  My dad was into the more oldies type stuff.  He loves the Beach Boys, Bob Seger, George Thorogood, and Joe Cocker.  A lot of really good classic country music too.  He used to love to blast his records first thing in the morning when I visited.  With my mom and stepdad, I heard a lot of classic rock.  Zeppelin, of course, but also Boston, Hendrix, Deep Purple, Skynard, ZZ Top, Blue Oyster Cult.  They even had Abba, on 8 track.  Wherever I went, there was always music.  As I got older, MTV became a staple in my home.  Although I have to say that the proliferation of videos caused a downgrade in the quality of rock music starting in the 80s, I was really into them at the time.  Duran Duran was my absolute favorite, and I still love listening to their songs from that time.  I didn't really know what I missed out on from the previous generation, which was album cover art.  I can't imagine my world without the cover of Dark Side of the Moon in it.  But those were the good old days.  Now you can get whatever song you want at the touch of a button.  It's not always so good for the musicians, so I don't mind paying for music services.  They should be compensated for their work and creativity.  At this time, however, I have competely ditched our sucky local radio stations in favor of Pandora, and I would happily pay for satellite radio if I had the equipment and it was affordable.  The good thing is that I now have access to a lot of music that I would probably never hear otherwise.  Most of our local radio stations seem to play the same tired songs over and over again until my ears bleed.  

So it seems that with technology, we have lost some good things associated with music, but we have also gained from it.  I guess you just have to take the bad with the good.

What does it all mean for me?  It is indescribable.  All I can say is that I can't imagine my life without a lot of music in it.  If I ever become deaf, my sense of touch will just have to make up for the loss of hearing.  I would have to develop such sensitivity that I can pick up a lot from feeling the vibrations.  I just love music that much.

Badass lawyers

Well I have just searched for a social security disability attorney.  What a distasteful chore.  Why do these people feel that they need to present themselves as some kind of badass?  Seriously, if I ever see another picture or advertisement of some older person with their arms folded, trying to look tough, it will be far too soon.  I have contacted one and I am sure I will be hearing from them tomorrow.  Probably before I'm awake.

As I figure, what could it hurt? I might get some money out of it, and most of it would be money I paid into that trust fund in the past.  At any rate, I might get money for my son.  If I get told I don't qualify, then that's two attorneys who wouldn't take my case.  That means I'm too healthy.

My job search will continue for the time being.  I really do miss working.  I don't want to go somewhere that will depress me, so I am trying to stick with companies that have a good reputation, as well as a few small organizations that advertise for help.  I think it would help me to get out.  However, I don't look forward to paying for day care.  That is the next thing I need to research.

Part of me thinks the hubby is doing this so that he can leave us, free of guilt.  He's really been bugging me about this a lot.  He makes a good living most of the time, when he can manage to keep a job.  The one he just started is going to be one of the most lucrative.

It has become pretty clear to me that he doesn't love me anymore, and that feeling is mutual.  Personally, I can't wait to get out of this prison of a marriage, and I have told him as much just this past week. 

I guess I'd better go back to my research for now.  I'm so glad for the internet.

My son's awesome Lego imagination

Every night when my son is home I lie down with him at his bedtime and he talks my ear off. Mostly he regales me with every detail of movies or tv shows he has watched or books he has read. Sometimes he tells me the scenarios from his "Lego imagination". Tonight his Lego story involved the Avengers, Mandarin, Bane, the Joker. Jabba the Hut, Boba Fett, Luke Skywalker, Princess Leia, Han Solo, Chewbacca, C3PO, and R2D2. It involved Captain America stealing the President's autopen, and he was eventually frozen in carbonite for his crime, temporarily. The plot was loosely based on the Spongebob Squarepants Movie. It was epic.

He may be long winded, but I love his mind.  He constantly amazes me with his attention to detail, as well as his ability to cross mythological genres.  He amazes me, period.